November 14, 2011

November 14, 2011

What are the dangers of sarcasm?  In sarcasm there is always a victim.  It is easy when joking or playing to say things that aren’t really true but highlight some aspect of a person that can really sting, even if they don’t let it show that it stings.  Sarcasm has a tendency of being so general rather than directly pointing something out.  This just leaves more room for imagination which is not always a good thing.  It can make the individual and others present question things about that individual that can be harmful as opposed to highlighting specific things, preferably in a constructive way and safe environment which tells the individual things about them they can change instead of generalizing.  Sarcasm is belittling.  It can be difficult to tell when someone is being serious or sarcastic and everyone uses different forms which can make it even more difficult to tell the difference.  This makes it hard to trust people. 

Sarcasm can be a potential problem in dating.  I don’t know that I think it is always a problem, but I think it can be.  It is common way that young people, especially young people of the opposite sex interact with each other.  The biggest problem I have noticed with sarcasm is when it is mean.  Granted we don’t always know which things will come across as mean as different things mean different things to different people, but if you feel mean or you sense that the other person might feel like the comments are too much then I think changes need to be made.  Especially as dating occurs and families start to be formed belittling and putting down are not things you want to have in your home. 

This is something I struggle with.  I don’t want these to become problems in my marriage and I don’t want things like this to exist between my children.  So what is the balance between being playful and being mean and how do you find it?  I’m still working on that.